Saturday, 1 August 2009

Once and for All

photo from here

This was said by the Belgian production het Ontroerend Goed "We're gonna do a play about teenagers but about a lot more than teenagers who feel like teenagers during their teens:about the utter chaos in our heads,the urge to go far too far, pimples?and dozens of other topics that will enrich your lives. We'll pull down the barriers between the way we are onstage and off We'll update the definition of puberty We get on your nerves, but for once you'll understand why.We will make all other art on puberty superfluous You'll think we're super cool."

'Once and for all we're gonna tell you who we are so shut up and listen' is a play performed by 13 teenagers in the age from 14 to 18. They don't talk much because everything they would say is a cliche said one girl. The show is therefore very much physical theatre.

We bought a ticket through the school and went to this play yesterday night. It put us right back to earth. My mother told me once "When you became a teenager I asked you why do you have to be like this" and I said "I don't want to be the nice girl anymore" I wanted to belong, to grow up, to find out who I was, to have fun, to do the things adults do, to love, to escape, to do things differently than my parents did. I was a teenager.

When seeing this play it all came back, the good, the ugly, the energy, the lethargic, the vulnerability, the rebelliousness, the childishness, the aggressive. It is shown in chaos, a roller coaster of hormones, of growing up.

I had a busy week doing a lot of work, dealing with problems than on a Saturday having to deal with a teenager caused a breakdown. Than we break up, I mean cheered up and went to the play.

Afterwards, we were all eating chips with mayo at 10 pm at night (bad to the bone). We were sitting on the couch together in peace, we hugged and we understood. We were thinking about the line one kid said on stage "Everything has been done before but not by me and not now." Tomorrow everything will be back to normal again. But we know now all the above belongs to normal.

Aroha Marja Give your teenager a hug tonight


  1. I'll do just as you say and give my thirteen year-old son a hug and then go get a couple of beers because of the realization that I have several more years of this teenage stuff to deal with.

    Once he is off to college I have my six year-old daughter coming up from behind with her teenage years. That one might kill me.

  2. Brings it all back! Cherish these growing years

  3. It's hard looking back at times, even realizing our own teens want their own life outside of us.

    This sounds like it was a day for hugs.

  4. It is all normal isn't it? Sometimes we forget and sometimes we try too hard to cut corners for them because it all has been done us we think. :)

    But, we can't.... as much as it is such an emotional, spiritual, physical difficult stretching process and our intent for the most part is to help alleviate the growing pains, we do more damage if we don't recognize it as normal and needed. it reminds me of the butterfly story....and the need for it to break out of its cocoon on its own. If we help it too much it won't gain the nutrients it needs to develop.

    Not that we leave our teens be though either. Our moral, emotional and spiritual guidance is so very needed. It's just finding the right moments to be there.

    Timely for me to read Marja. Thank you.

  5. You said it all Dana Is is hard to get the balance right sometimes. But I guess we are learning too


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