Washington Post’s Mensa Invitational New Words Contest

Our chicken keeps on escaping from the chicken coup and she is never more than a meter away from the cat. That's about the distance the cat will allow. "Can I have any peace?" she asks

2011 is about one of the busiest years in my life and one with the most upheavals. I try to keep my blog running though because I know times will change and I will get time again for writing poetry and articles which I love so much. What we need in times like these is lots of laughs and here is one which worked for me:

Washington Post’s Mensa Invitational New Words Contest
Here is the Washington Post’s Mensa Invitational which once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition.


Here are the winners:
1. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.
2. Ignoranus : A person who’s both stupid and an asshole.
3. Intaxicaton : Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.
4. Reintarnation : Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
5. Bozone ( n.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
6. Foreploy : Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.
7. Giraffiti : Vandalism spray-painted very, very high
8. Sarchasm : The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn’t get it.
9. Inoculatte : To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
10. Osteopornosis : A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)
11. Karmageddon : It’s like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it’s like, a serious bummer.
12. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.
13. Glibido : All talk and no action.
14. Dope-ler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
15. Arachnoleptic Fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you’ve accidentally walked through a spider web.
16. Beelzebug (n.) : Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
17. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you’re eating.

The Washington Post has also published the winning submissions to its yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words.
And the winners are:

1. Coffee, n. the person upon whom one coughs.
2. Flabbergasted, adj. appalled by discovering how much weight one has gained.
3. Abdicate , v. to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
4. Esplanade , v. to attempt an explanation while drunk.
5. Willy-nilly, adj. impotent.
6. Negligent , adj. absentmindedly answering the door when wearing only a nightgown.
7. Lymph , v. to walk with a lisp.
8. Gargoyle, n. olive-flavored mouthwash.
9. Flatulence+, n. emergency vehicle that picks up someone who has been run over by a steamroller.
10. Balderdash , n. a rapidly receding hairline.
11. Testicle, n. a humorous question on an exam.
12. Rectitude, n. the formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.
13. Pokemon, n. a Rastafarian proctologist.
14. Oyster, n. a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.
15. Frisbeetarianism, n. the belief that, after death, the soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.
16. Circumvent, n. an opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men

A poem by Bill Manhire

The Voyage

All night the water laps
the hedges. I hold you in the middle
of the air
Don't sleep
all night. It is pitch
black, but since
there is a vista, let
your throat be the
the lantern.
Since there is a window, let us
open it.
Let us dress
for a voyage. Let me
go out, with
your voice, to call for you.

Bill Manhire, NZ poet

 

Update CBD Christchurch

We don't come very often in the central city anymore except for Hagley park which is as stunning as ever. The reason is of course that there isn't much city anymore and as you can see and hear from the video underneath still a lot of buildings need to be demolished so it takes a while before they start rebuilding although some renovation has started.
Cashel street and Ballentynes has been opened for the public and the empty spaces are filled with container shops. You can see pictures from it on the blog Eliza's dream The containers look cool and I think it is a great idea as it puts colour to the damaged city

 

A greeting from a happy punter in Hagley Park

The people of Christchurch can get free bus rides through their city which will be like the one underneath. On the bus ride on you tube you get an update about the buildings by the demolishing manager

Another visit to Manderley

Today I visited Manderley home and garden festival for the second year. I didn't intend to post about it as I did last year. There were however so many colour full people, a horse and a sheep for example that I had to get the camera out of my bag.

NZ the country of about 40.1 million sheep. Nothing special here you say but what about a blue one.

The festival is on part of  the 750 acre land of the Manderley farm. On the farmland are 100 beef cattle kept and 1400 sheep. It is situated on a stunning spot, surrounded with hills and opposite Lake Forsyth and it has a gorgeous little river running through the property.

Cheerful flowers pop out of the suitcase, specially for you broo Happy birthday

A lady appears out of a piece of oemaru limestone. Oemaru stone is popular with carvers in NZ as is quite a soft stone.

I loved these gorgeous carved chess pieces

A lady and her hat(s). Hats are popular and especially worn during the races

Rocking pink is not only popular with teenagers as you see. This horse rocks in more than one way. He is also the host of two gorgeous chicken who like to have a ride on his back.

quote of the week

 

How to be beautiful:

"For attractive lips, speak words of kindness. For lovely eyes, seek out the good in people. For a slim figure, share your food with the hungry. For beautiful hair, let a child run his or her fingers through it once a day. For poise, walk with the knowledge you'll never walk alone. People, even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, and redeemed. Never throw out anybody. Remember, If you ever need a helping hand, you'll find one at the end of your arm. As you grow older, you will discover that you have two hands, one for helping yourself, the other for helping others. The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman is seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides. True beauty in a woman is reflected in her soul. It is the caring that she lovingly gives, the passion that she shows, and the beauty of a woman only grows with passing years."

Audrey Hepburn.